Day 292- Talent Show!

(Sunday)

Hey guys,

      So, today was kind of a big deal for me. Today I stepped on the stage and performed for the first time since leaving Chicago(except for worship leading, which doesn't really count...)! Also, I was doing a solo, which is very different for me. In my whole life, I have only done ONE other solo, so it was a lot of pressure! Any musician knows that performing as part of a group, and performing as an individual are two COMPLETELY different things. If something goes wrong musically, it is on you. If you do not get the response you want to from an audience, it reflects on YOU and the performance YOU gave. In essence, doing a solo is very, VERY intimidating, so I was freaking out. Because I've been a performer for the vast majority of my life, I very rarely get stage fright, usually when I step on the stage, I am confident and excited. As I sat in the back of the room trying to get some food in me before the show started(I was up FIRST), I was quite literally shaking, I cannot remember being this scared to go on stage, I was terrified. As the minutes crept slowly by, my blood pressure and nerves continued to steadily climb, I wanted nothing more than to run as fast as I could out of the room. The performer side of me however, knew that the show must go on, I need to swallow my nerves, and whatever else is going on, step onto the stage and KILL IT, like I always do. I have had many performances where I probably should NOT have gone out, I've performed in a walking boot, on crutches, with the stomach flu, the list could go on and on. So tonight, as those nerves started peaking, I KNEW that deep down, I am a performer, the stage is where I LOVE to be, and the stage is where I flourish, so I needed to just stop worrying about everything, go out there and have fun. After the show, I was told by so many people how good i did, and it just made me so happy, performing really isn't for everyone, the pressure of the stage can be too much for people sometimes, but I know, when it comes down to it, I AM a performer, and no matter WHAT is going on backstage and before performances, I'm going to walk onto that stage, and give it my all.

<3 Always,
Rose